Terumah, Recovery, and the God Who Dwells With Us
In my early years, the word “hammered” meant something very different from what it does today. It meant wasted, inebriated, lost. I drank and used drugs to escape myself — my memories, my emotions, and the nightmares I didn’t know how to face. I ran from the church too, from the judgment and criticism that felt nothing like the God I desperately needed.
But God intervened.
Through a powerful encounter with the Holy Spirit, I got clean and sober. I returned to the church I grew up in and began seeking His will. He led me to college, to a degree in Substance Abuse Counseling. My internship at a women’s inpatient facility awakened my own unprocessed trauma, which led me into therapy and the rooms of AA. The Twelve Steps became a lifeline. Eventually, when I was ready, He led me into the study of generational trauma and addiction.
Fast-forward twenty years.
After losing everything in a divorce, I left the man-made church and found my way into a Torah community. There, I discovered His feast days, His ancient paths, and the recovery messages woven into every Torah portion. Eventually, He called me to share Torah-rooted recovery with the world.
Terumah: A Blueprint for Inner Reconstruction
This week’s Torah portion, Terumah, gives Moses detailed instructions for building the Tabernacle — a dwelling place for God’s presence in the wilderness. But before the Tabernacle came generations of dysfunction: deception, jealousy, favoritism, violence, rejection, and trauma. Genesis is the story of the first broken families — and the first glimpses of God’s redeeming love.
- Adam and Eve: deception, blame, shame, disconnection
- Cain and Abel: jealousy, violence, murder
- Abraham and Sarah: infertility, deception, favoritism
- Hagar and Ishmael: abuse, rejection, survival
- Isaac and Rebecca: manipulation, divided loyalties
- Jacob, Leah, and Rachel: competition, jealousy, emotional neglect
- Jacob’s sons: rivalry, hatred, violence
- Judah and Tamar: power abuse and hypocrisy
Despite Israel’s failures, God still desired to dwell with them. His desire hasn’t changed.
Terumah and the Twelve Steps
Terumah begins with willingness — “from every heart that is willing.”
- Steps 1–3: Willingness to begin
- The inner sanctuary mirrors Steps 4–5
- The Menorah’s light reflects Steps 6–7
- The Table of the Presence echoes Steps 8–9
- The Courtyard’s boundaries resemble Step 10
- The Tabernacle as a whole reflects Steps 11–12
Terumah becomes a spiritual blueprint for recovery.
The Widow’s Offering: Terumah in Action
In the Brit Hadasha portion, we meet the widow who gave everything she had. Her offering wasn’t about quantity — it was about courage. She teaches us that God measures the heart, not the size of the gift.
A Meditation for the Journey
Recovery begins with fragments — honesty, hope, breath. These are the materials of a sanctuary. Every truth spoken, every boundary held, every prayer whispered becomes another board, another curtain, another place where His presence can dwell.
God builds holy places out of what we think is too little.
God builds holy places out of us.
If you struggle to love yourself, you’re not alone. But you are fearfully and wonderfully made, infused with beauty and purpose from the beginning.
If you need encouragement or direction on your journey, visit:
moderndaysamaritan.com
or email:
[email protected]
Shalom until next week.
“Is not my word like fire,” declares the Lord, “and like a hammer that breaks a rock in pieces?” — Jeremiah 23:29
